Surgery Thoughts

Now that some time has passed I have let this whole horrible IUD mishap sink in, I am really upset over it. I understand that accidents happen and doctors aren't going to 100% the entire time. They try their best and I appreciate that. I am grateful for the hundreds of doctors and nurses that have blessed our lives.

With that said, doctors really shouldn't be pushing IUD's. In fact, it should be the other way around. I was set on using condoms, have dealt with them in the past and could continue dealing with them because I hate feeling hormonal on the pill. The doctor really, really suggested I try an IUD, insisting I would love it. So many people are doing it. It has little side affects, if any, etc etc and laughed when I told him my family are always the one in a million.

So, I have no problem if people chose to get IUD's, however, I do have a problem that doctors are out there trying to tell people that this is the best form of birth control and is great with little side affects. If someone is interested in one or options, the patient should ask and get an informed response, pluses and minuses. Not a biased, probably untruthful response.

I really have been involved in just pediatric care. A lot of the board, panels, research studies and reviews of pamphlets and such has been about patient/provider interactions. Well, this experience has made me want to be an advocate against IUDS and an advocate on how doctors should give information. Why are they doing these things that have these affects.

I am a little nervous about the surgery. It shouldn't be complicated, but hate the idea that it is floating around somewhere near my reproductive organs. Who knows the affects it has had on my uterus. It just aggravates me. The only peace that I get about the entire fertility situation is knowing that I can adopt if all else fails. I have peace that the Lord is over all and he is over the children I will be blessed with. It still just angers me to do this surgery. If I have trouble getting pregnant in the future I am blaming it on this stupid IUD situation. I hate that I have to do something over something that could have been prevented.

Part of me is kind of becoming a little pessimistic about medical situations. I am scared the surgery won't go well because things usually have complications with us. That is kind of sad that I have gotten to that point. I don't want to be like that. I don't want to think that our children will have something wrong with them because our other kids have, but you just kind of start preparing for the worst when you have dealt with poor diagnoses.

I talked with a couple of people today at church and one had a horrible time getting pregnant after getting it taken out and the other had this happen to her sister. This was probably over 20 years ago when they were having a lot of problems and are supposed to be new and improved, but are they really? Or has enough time just passed that they can market it to our generation because we don't remember all the lawsuits and horrible things that were happening to people and their babies. Unless you really do research, which I should have, you don't know the entire story about IUDs.

I have done research that has shown affects totally opposite what my doctor told me about IUDs. I learned my lesson.

Today in church we talked about Judges, the children of Israel and the pride cycle. People were talking about how bad things turn you to the Lord. I thought of a quote from Elder Eyring, how he is turned to the Lord and spiritually strengthened by remembering his blessings. So here are some blessings that I have realized amidst my rantings....

I didn't get pregnant while having a misplaced IUD which could have very well turned into a much more devastating result of loosing a child from the affects of the IUD on the child.

I am grateful that Danny and I listen to the spirit. I am grateful for prayer and knowing that the Lord is guiding our lives as long as we allow it.

I am grateful for my children!! I am so blessed. I love them all so much for very unique and special ways.

I am grateful that I learned to do my homework. I think if I really researched this and realized to expect the worst thing to happen to me instead of assuming it wouldn't happen to me I wouldn't have done it.

I am grateful for a loving husband who supports me and uplifts me.

I am grateful for amazing family and friends. I can't tell you how many people were willing to take the boys or Kira the instant they heard about this. I am so fortunate to be surrounded by so much love!! When the surgeon was asking if I could do it the following day or Tuesday, I knew I could do it whenever because I had so many people who I could have called and would have helped. People who I know would rearrange schedules for me and my family. That is such a blessing. I hope that my family and friends know that they can count on me like I feel I can count on them. It makes life so full!!