Saturday, December 13, 2008
Some bad news
Well, some of you know that I am pregnant. Most don't since we were awaiting further testing due to Tylers condition. I had a 20 week ultrasound yesterday which showed that the baby's brain tissue is severly underdeveloped. If this child makes it to term, he will be unable to function on his own and die shortly thereafter. While we are devastated and hurting, we are grateful at this time for our faith and a loving Heavenly Father who has a plan for this child and our family. We know that the child will come to this earth to gain a body before returning to his Heavenly Father. We also know that we will someday be reunited and have the opportunity to raise this child as our own. There are a lot of questions that still need to be answered. We will keep you updated once we find out more about what is going on. Please keep our family in your prayers.
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24 comments:
Heidi and Danny,
We ran into your parents last night and heard the unfortunate news. Our hearts are aching for you. We hope that you find the answers you are looking for and that you deserve to have. You guys are such a wonderful family and always in our thoughts and prayers. Scott and Tyler are blessed to have such devoted and strong parents. Please let us know if there is anything we can do to help.
Much Love,
Knute and Paris
I am SO sorry to hear this news. I don't have the right words to say... we will pray for you to find strength and comfort. I am thankful that you have the gospel in your lives and that you know this isn't the end, just a small window of time, and you will all be together again. It doesn't take away the pain you feel right now though. Your sweet family will continue to be in our prayers as you learn more, continue on your next 20 weeks, and prepare for what's to come.
Hugs from AZ
Andrea
I just wanted to let you know that you are in our prayers this holiday season. I know that if anyone can be strong in this situation that it is you two. Good Luck in the coming weeks. We Love You!
Heidi & Danny,
This news makes my heart hurt. I know how it feels to go from the anticipation & joy of welcoming a precious new baby to your home to the disappointment & pain of loss. I too look forward to raising a little one on the other side. I'm glad you have the knowledge of our Father's plan of happiness & that you have the help of faith, family & friends to get you through this difficult time. You will be in my prayers.
Love,
Melissa R
Words can't even describe how sad I was to have heard your news yesterday. Your courage and faith is an inspiration to everyone and always has been. As I will never know the pain that you are going through, I hope you know that you can lean on the rest of us to comfort you and give you support.
We love you so much and are so grateful to have you, Danny, Scott and Tyler in our lives. This baby boy is sure to be an angel sent to us for what will seem to be such a short time, but sure to be another amazing part of our family.
All my love, thoughts and prayers are with you.
Heidi & Danny,
I am so sorry. I can't imagine how hard this must be. As everyone else has said, you two are so strong.
You have found so many blessings through your journey with Tyler & I imagine you will do the same in this case.
We are thinking of you & pray that you will feel the Lords love for you.
Dear Heidi and Danny,
My heart aches for you. I'm so sorry to hear that. I just can't even imagine the pain and soul-searching that this news has caused. I pray that you will continue to hope in eternity and the plan our Father in Heaven has for each of His children.
We will love another McMillan boy as long as possible!
Love,
Julia
Heidi & Danny-
My heart aches for you, because I have travelled down that road myself- a couple of times, and I know it is very difficult. I also know, that your faith and hope in the Lord, Jesus Christ is what is going to sustain you through this. That, and the love of your family and friends. And you will come out of this experience even stronger. The Lord must have some tremendous blessings in store for your little family to have given you so many trials to deal with. It is how you deal with it that will bring forth renewed strength and his blessings. You are an inspiration to many. May God bless and comfort you during this difficult time, and know that my prayers are with you. I will put your name on the prayer roll at the temple.
Love Jeanne Lamb
Oh Heidi, I'm sitting here wiping tears from my eyes and snot from my nose! Dave and Rio and I are sending big huge warm loving faith-filled bear hugs telepathically.
Danny and Heidi,
We are so sorry for this devastating news. It must be very difficult at this time. We will keep you in our prayers.
Love,
David and Juliann
My prayers are with you.
Heidi,
I am so sorry to hear the news. We are thinking and praying for you and know that your strong faith and Heavenly Father's love will get you through this trying time.
My prayers will be with you. I have no doubt that Heavenly Father will guide you and bless you with peace.
Oh, my dear, dear friend. I am so sorry to hear this!
Thank God that the babies you already have are healthy, and God willing, Tyler will continue to amaze us all with his strength.
Sometimes it feels like you just can't get a break, but I know that God has a plan for you, and that his goal is your forever happiness.
You are, as always, in our prayers.
Heidi and Danny,
Our hearts go out to you! This was such sad sad news. I know the feeling of hoping and waiting for a child and losing him. You are such wonderful parents and are such amazing people. Our thoughts are with you and your family.
Love, Kathy N
I haven't been able to stop thinking about you guys since we read this news. You have been in my prayers several times each day. We love you and are happy to hear that you are staying close to the Lord. I wish I could convey more of how I've felt and what I've been thinking these past couple days. Blogger isn't exactly the medium for that sort of thing. But I do have a testimony of the power of prayer and I know that our Heavenly Father has a plan for each of us. We will continue to keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
Love,
Amy, Clay and Sam
Man - I am so sorry to hear that. I don't even know what to say other than we'll be praying thinking about you. You guys are a lot stronger than I am, so I know you'll be ok, but I still sorry you have to go through that.
This sad sad news has caused our hearts to hurt so much. We can't imagine how yours must be feeling. We were amazed at your blog entry to still show so much faith through this adversity. I read this quote today and immediately thought of you: “Adversity can increase faith or instead can cause the troubling roots of bitterness to spring up…One’s life, therefore, cannot be both faith-filled and stress-free… Therefore, how can you and I really expect to glide naively through life, as if to say, “Lord, give me experience, but not grief, not sorrow, not pain, not opposition, not betrayal, and certainly not to be forsaken. Keep from me, Lord, all those experiences which made Thee what Thou art! Then, let me come and dwell with Thee and full share Thy joy. (Neal A. Maxwell, Ensign, May 1991, 88-90)You guys are our examples of faith and we love you so much. Love, Mom and Dad McMillan
Dear Heidi and Danny,
My heart is so heavy hearing your news. You will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. You are on the Saint Matthew prayer chain so there are lots of people praying for you and lifting up your family. Your strong faith is so amazing and touches all who read your words.
Marcie Diffenderfer & family
oh my gosh heidi and danny. i don't even know what to say just that my heart is heavy and will include your family in my prayers.
i love your divine love and knowledge of the gospel. although i didn't hang out with you a lot before we moved, i enjoyed the light that radiated from you, especially when the topic of the gospel came up.
Dear Heidi and Danny,
I am so sorry to hear this news. This little baby is so blessed to have such wonderful parents. You continue to be an inspiration to me. We will be keeping you in our prayers.
Love,
Angie
One of my friends that is also a heart Mom told me about your website. I am the proud mother to two angel babies. Our order is switched from yours. Our first, a little girl named Lilly, was born with a condition called Holoprosencephaly. Her condition was the most severe, and doctor after doctor told us that it would be a miracle if she made it to be born alive. We did not abort, but were told that if it ever came to be too much, that they would induce and pretty much let whatever happen happen. I met with an amazing angel hospice group that was strictly for support, and the two nurses were amazing. They helped me make plans for what was going to be. At 37.5 weeks, I went in for my appointment. I emotionally was done, and could no longer go on. They tried a couple of things to get me started, and the next day I was admitted and started on pitocin. After 10 hours, I was dilated to a six. Ten hours later, I was still a six. I was drained, both physically and emotionally, and had my nurse call my doctor and he told them to prep me for a c-section. At 5:13 am, our Lilly was born. They had my husband take her over to me to say hello and goodbye, because she was not doing well. It seemed thought the Lord had something more in plan. She seemed to rally and improve. Needless to say, we had
5 1/2 amazing weeks with her, with 5 of them being at home with us. Ryker was born 1 year and 9 days later, with HLHS. He had his surgery and lived 7 weeks when he passed away VERY unexpectedly. So here we are, with Ryker's angel day tomorrow. It sucks to see your baby suffer, and it sucks to not have them here, but I know I will be with them again some day. We have our adoption papers in and although it may not be the end of our biological kids, it is the path we are taking right now. Anyways, if you need to ever talk, my e-mail is emilygourley@gmail.com. Feel free to visit our blog, and know you will be in our prayers.
Heart hugs,
Emily Gourley
I know that I already told you this but you are such a good example. I am amazed by your faith and perspective. And your gratitude. We will keep your family in our prayers.
Love,
Denae
Heidi,
I had no idea all of this was going on. I am so so sorry. We will keep you in our prayers. You are amazing and your baby is blessed to have you as a mother, even if only for a very short time. Again, our prayers will be with you guys.
Love, Heather
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