SUNDAY FUNDAY

Parker gave a great talk in Primary today.  He didn't want to do it last night but changed his mind, folded his talk in his pocket and was excited.  It was cute.  About 1 minute before his turn you saw him reading it to himself.  He did great!  He talked about King Benjamin and how he served and how we can serve.  He felt good about himself and I had to take a pic afterwards.  I got to sub in Hanna's primary class.  It was so fun!  We built a tower with chairs.  You can still see some of the kids wanted to sit in 2 chairs and they each said "When you are in the service of your fellow beings, you are in the service of your God."  They learned what fellow and beings was and had a great time climbing up the tower.  After we talked about how we can serve.  Primary is quick with 2 hour church and if  you can just make one experience memorable and spirit filled it is a success.  I think we did that today.  It is always great to be with Hanna!! I have started to appreciate the little moments we have with individual kids.  

As I am getting older and maybe since Scott is gone, I try to take advantage of little moments of connecting with the kids.  Blake had an early release day on Tuesday.  Kira goes to the Orchards with her friends.  Sometimes Blake goes but he doesn't have as close of friends as Kira and I think sometimes just kind of feels lost in the mix, which I remember feeling in middle school.  I picked him up and we went to Chipotle.  As I sat there and he told me about his day and the things going on, I realize how important just going to lunch and taking advantage of time with a child is.  I got to tell him how proud I was of him and I think he felt loved.  The last pic is him enjoying his burrito at Chipotle.  We saw the Bishop, Brock and Sydney there which was fun.

The college kids, my young women group, are back from college!  We love having them back. Livi said all the Elders coming home this transfer were in her MTC district including Elder Garlick, Scott's trainer.  Such a small world and fun connection.  We took a pic to send to them.  

Olivia's boyfriend came to church today and he is going on a study abroad to Barcelona and served his mission in Chile but in the northern Chile mission in a desert for 6 months since he was in San Diego during Pandemic for the first 18 months.  Quite a different experience. We love our ward!  Camellia is holding pickles.  The youth had a pickle ball, pickles and bracelet fundraiser for camp.  I think it was a success.  We didn't make it to the pickle ball tournament because we were at the swim meet but Brother Halverson won...WAHOO!!  He hired a trainer that Tyler said would often come to the church with him after seminary so very deserving and I think very proud of the W! 

 

DALS 2024

I spent my Saturday at DALS, our league finals for Northgate Swim.  It was finals for Varsity in the morning and Trials/Finals for JV in the afternoon. A lot of Scott't friends from different high schools swam in the morning and I was able to cheer them on which was a lot of fun.  It is great to see kids doing what they love amongst friends.  That is what brings Scott and Tyler the most joy with swimming and me as well.  I made it to about half the meet and Tyler and Danny came for the JV meet in the afternoon.  Tyler wasn't feeling great but he still got a best time and had a lot of fun.  I love these kiddos and love watching them improve, be with friends and cheer each other on.  

I did Tuesday mornings this year and the second week the kids wanted to go in the weight room which ended up being so much fun.  We I got the routine down by week 3.  We put on music and everyone had a good time.  Afterwards, we would work on starts and turns which everyone needs.  I think we'll keep the tradition and momentum going next year.  It was something different and great for team bonding and working on stretching, strength, starts and turns which everyone needs.  It is easier to get to know the kids since they are out of the water.  A lot of them have never been in the weight room or just being introduced to it so it was a lot of just learning to do motions slowly and correctly which is a valuable skill for all.  Overall, I had a great time being with them once a week.  

43

I turned 43 and it was the best day ever!  I started the day off with the best gift, being able to talk to Scott for the first time in Chile. He is loving his mission and I get to hear and see how his heart is filled with love for the Chileans and their way of life.  

  And then I was showered with so much LOVE at Woodlands!  I love my job, the kids I get to coach and am so grateful for all their parents and all they do to make our summer filled with fun.  Coaching summer rec is not for the faint of heart in our area but our swim family and kids make the crazy moments and anonymous letters worth it.  The kids made so many cards for me.  I can't wait to post them in the coaches office!  Each kids has their strengths and struggles and I hope at the end of the day I helped make life just a little easier and happier for them.

And then we ended our day at MYO with Danny and the other 5 kids who are my heart.  Hanna and Parker started an otter pop business and Hanna gave mea  card with $10 of her own money.  It was so sweet and thoughtful.  Parker asked to go to the store all day and he and Danny rode their bikes to Safeway and he got me chocolate.  Kira got me an airpod tag so I don't lose my kids and blake got me a phone charger since mine always disappears.  They were all so thoughtful and I feel so blessed.  

As I reflected on these past 43 years, the one thing that filled my heart all day as I got messages and texts was how grateful I am for the amazing people God has placed in my life.  Scott and I were talking about the struggles some of his siblings have faced in the last 15 years whether it is health or emotional and you I could see his empathy, compassion and increased love towards them and others he has because of that.  I see it in my own life as well.  

Hanna and Blake have a hard time regulating emotions but they are doing immensely better have worked really hard to learn skills to regulate emotions.  Neither of them want to be that way.  They are often embarrassed and feel bad after the fact.  They both really want friends and in their good moments they have some incredible qualities.  

Yesterday, Hanna was playing with a friend after school and the parents have always not been the nicest towards me or her but everyday she asks for a playdate.  So I decided to venture out and ask the dad if we could set up a playdate and he was so mean to us in front of Hanna.  It made Hanna, the other girl and myself so sad but she just responded with, "Its ok.  We can play at school," to the other girl and "mommy, don't let people make you sad," to me.  More than anything I just felt bad for him.  

That experience taught me two things.  First, I am grateful for my trials because they have made me a better person.  I am more full of empathy, compassion and understanding.  As I saw these two little girls playing so nicely and both so sad they couldn't do a playdate I realized what it meant to be like a little child.  This dad is so full of anger and hate.  You just sense it whenever he is around but here are these girls that are quick to forgive and be full of love.

And those are the type people who God has placed in my life that I am so grateful for! When I want to just give up or feel defeated, I have friends who lift me up, help my kids and are quick to love.  And as I venture into my mid 40's those are the things and gifts that matter the most!  I recognize I am grateful for the hard times, because they make me recognize the good. I am grateful for my trials, because they help refine me and make me a better person.  Here's to a great 43rd year!

80 DEGREES

 When it is 80 degrees out, it is definitely time for a pool party.  We put together a last minute Sunday afternoon dinner with friends and had a blast.  Rasmussen, Wirig, Wirig, Walker and Halversons make for a fun night! We have the greatest friends in our life.  We are so blessed! Reagan and Tyler has goals locked in for DALS and Oliver is locked in for emotional support.  Tyler did SeaSerpents at Heather Farms and found Brennan playing volleyball which was a fun surprise for dinner.  The girls enjoyed the hot tub, the boys enjoyed basketball and the adults enjoyed having kids entertaining each other and great food!  

WST YEAR 5

Year 5 of me at Woodlands has begun and in a lot of ways it the easiest year yet.  When you take over a new team, you patiently chip away at one thing at a time until it finally feels like the team you envisioned and worked so hard to create.  

This journey was a little different due to COVID.  Year 1 was COVID camps.  Countless hours on zoom meetings with the county and adjusting just to function.  We split everyone into groups of 12 with different instructors.  Parents were heightened and everyone had different comfort levels.  I tried to remind people that if it wasn't time for them to come back, that was ok.  Easier said than done since everyone wanted their children to participate but many were filled with so much anxiety.  It was interesting to hear from coaches in other parts of the country whose states responded differently to COVID.  At the end of the day, grateful we got to do something since we were in one of the most restricted areas in the country. 

Year 2 was also modified due to COVID.  I think we ran meets with little kids in the morning and bigger kids at night to make it less kids.  I don't remember how many meets we even had but it was very different.  We didn't have any socials but at least the kids could participate in swim. 

Year 3 we were pretty much back to normal.  I took over a team in which I was the 4th coach in 4 years.  As a result, almost all the 15-18s left for other teams.  By the time you are a 15-18 you want consistency and want to go where all your friends are.  I knew that in time, it would organically grow but there wasn't much I could do to fix that problem but knew it time people would come. The first year was just observing how everything ran and trying to make things better. That is also hard for your coaches because they are used to listening to 4 different ways of doing things.  It takes patience on all ends and treading lightly.

Rec swim is an interesting culture because you have parents dedicating so much of their time to making the season run, have their own kids who are involved and set on the traditions of the head coach they were closest to.  Over the last 20 years, I have learned that you tread lightly.  Some boards are easier to do that than others. 

You always build a team from the bottom up.  The bottom is your feeder program.  For us that was our kermits or pre-team. Kermits was full of older kids, like 8+, and 3 and 4 year old weren't allowed to participate.  We were cheap and allowed anyone, members or not, to participate. Being affordable is fine but sometimes it just attracts people who are looking for the cheapest program and not the best.  

A key to a little kid program is knowing when to let kids be independent.  It is a balance between making kids feel comfortable and at the same time uncomfortable to progress.  That is something that most new 13-14s coaches don't have the skills yet to know.  I would go back and forth between my 6&Unders and kermits to try to teach them how to do that but it split my time and was hard but I understood what was working and what wasn't.  The following year, I put the program 30 minutes before my 6&Unders so I could help train our instructors.  I made it so they had to be cabana members so that we were teaching kids who wanted to be on team.  I also made it for mostly 6&Unders. It took more time and effort in the beginning on my end for year 4 and 5 but I feel like next year I will have enough returning instructors that I will be able to delegate it more and have fed them to my 6&Under program which made my little kids stronger. 

That program is doing great.  My little kids are doing great.  We have a super fun culture and I am working on encouraging 15-18s to come and be a part of it.  Kids know my routine, coaches know my routine.  I have a board that is super supportive.  I am really excited for the best season yet.   

 

Stake Conference

We had a great stake conference.  Mike Chapman was announced as our new stake president.  It was fun getting to know President March the last few months as Scott prepared for his mission.  I grew up with Mike. He and Marci will be great leaders.  We are so lucky to have such incredible families in our area helping build this amazing community we have.  

We had two general authority 70 come to reorganize the Stake.  My two favorite quotes came from the Friday night session.  I think Elder Sabin said (it could have been the other general authority), "It's harder to be 95% in that 100%."  I think that applies to everything in life.  If you do it, do it well and do it with intent!  The gospel is no different.  It is so hard when we let 5% of how we live our lives or feel conflict with the other 95%. 

Elder Sabin talked about how when his 15 year old daughter got a double lung transplant a year after his son had passed from the same disease.  She said, "It doesn't matter if I wake up with new lungs or in a better place."  She was reminding her dad that all was well and to keep an eternal perspective.  

It was an edifying conference, especially coming after stake conference.  I have goals to attend the temple more frequently and live my life with a Christ centered perspective a little more.  So grateful for my relationship with my Savior and His gospel on this earth!  Grateful for the beautiful area we live and amazing people who surround and support our family! 

 

Blake's 12th Birthday Party

Blake had his 12th birthday party last night.  We have been waiting for the weather to be nice to host a hot tub/pool night with his 6th grade friends and the kids had a blast.  Pizza, junk food, hottubbing/dipping in a cold pool and smore's. Happy Birthday Blake!  We love you!  Here's to a great 12th year.  

 

Favorites from conference

Elder Holland...."I testify that God hears every prayer we offer and responds to each of them according to the path He has outlined for our perfection. I recognize that at roughly the same time so many were praying for the restoration of my health, an equal number—including me—were praying for the restoration of my wife’s health. I testify that both of those prayers were heard and answered by a divinely compassionate Heavenly Father, even if the prayers for Pat were not answered the way I asked. It is for reasons known only to God why prayers are answered differently than we hope—but I promise you they are heard and they are answered according to His unfailing love and cosmic timetable."

Sister Dennis...."The garment of the holy priesthood is deeply symbolic and also points to the Savior. When Adam and Eve partook of the fruit and had to leave the Garden of Eden, they were given coats of skins as a covering for them.³¹ It is likely that an animal was sacrificed to make those coats of skins—symbolic of the Savior’s own sacrifice for us. Kaphar is the basic Hebrew word for atonement, and one of its meanings is “to cover.”³² Our temple garment reminds us that the Savior and the blessings of His Atonement cover us throughout our lives. As we put on the garment of the holy priesthood each day, that beautiful symbol becomes a part of us.

In the New Testament book of Romans, we read: “The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light. … Put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ.”³³

I am so grateful for the privilege of wearing the garment of the holy priesthood to remind me that the Savior and the blessings of His infinite Atonement constantly cover me throughout my mortal journey. It also reminds me that as I keep the covenants I have made with God in the house of the Lord, I have symbolically put on Christ, who Himself is an armor of light. He will protect me from evil,³⁴ give me power and increased capacity,³⁵ and be my light and guide³⁶ through the darkness and difficulties of this world."

Covenant Confidence, Elder Soares..."Preparation isn’t just for those going to the temple for the first time. We all should be perpetually preparing to go to the house of the Lord. One stake I know has adopted the motto “Home centered, Church supported, and temple bound.” Bound¹⁰ is an interesting word in that it means focused on a direction, but it also means fastened to or secured by, resolved and determined, sure. So being temple bound secures us to the Savior, giving us proper direction and stability while ensuring we have covenant confidence through Jesus Christ. Therefore, all of us should intentionally enhance such binding by having our next appointment scheduled with the Lord in His holy house, whether the temple is near or far away."¹¹

Our dear prophet, President Russell M. Nelson, reminds us about these vital principles by saying: “The temple lies at the center of strengthening our faith and spiritual fortitude because the Savior and His doctrine are the very heart of the temple. Everything taught in the temple, through instruction and through the Spirit, increases our understanding of Jesus Christ. His essential ordinances bind us to Him through sacred priesthood covenants. Then, as we keep our covenants, He endows us with His healing, strengthening power. And oh, how we will need His power in the days ahead.”¹²

We also know from the temple that if we want the Spirit of the Lord to be unrestrained in our lives, we simply cannot and must not have unkind feelings toward anyone. Giving place in our hearts or minds for unkind feelings or thoughts will produce unkind words and actions, whether on social media or in our homes, causing the Spirit of the Lord to withdraw from our hearts. Therefore, please cast not away your confidence, but rather, let your confidence wax strong.

The ongoing and accelerating building of temples will continue to excite, inspire, and bless us. Yet more important, as we change our preparation to enter the temple, we will change our experience in the temple, which will transform our lives outside of the temple.

KIRA and CHOIR

Kira's choir had their first CMEA event and they got unanonymous superior. She was proud of her choir and we were proud of her for doing choir.  It was a good experience and she even recognized Jen Krey who was in our ward in Brentwood which was a long time ago for her.  She carpooled with friends, but hopefully I will find some pictures to add.  She is my first kid who wants to do choir in high school. Scott did choir in middle school but not in high school.  The high school choir teacher doesn't have the best reputation in our area and they are getting a new one next year so I am hoping it is a great experience for Kira. 

 

Northgate Golf

Tyler tried out for golf again this year and he made it.  He was really going through some challenging emotional things before Scott went on his mission and we weren't sure we were going to let him play.  He changed some behaviors and has been playing golf since.  He goes to the gym about 4x a week and has gained about 20 pounds in the last 6 months.  At first we has doing his own thing and then we signed him up for aquastrength for Jack which has been great.  It is the same program Scott does.  He showed me a couple of things they do and I did it with Northgate and felt it for a week.  We are very proud of him.  He has been put in a couple of matches.  They take 6 guys and 5 score.  The last tournament he got 4th for his team. He is so new but doing so great and really seems to be enjoying it. We are so proud of him and glad that he found a sport that brings him so much joy!  

Office Zone Barcelona

My mission president got released as a general authority 70 over Conference and it came with a lot of reflection for me.  He and his wife were two really influential people in my lives.  I got to spend my first 6 months in the field watching and interacting with them and noticed two things. They love the Lord and love others.  It made me realize that it goes hand in hand. Everyone always tells you that having a missionary in the field strengthens your home and testimony so much. One way that it does that is by helping you reflect on your time as a missionary which brings back experiences, feelings and a reminder of what service does to ones life.  One day I will put all my pictures in digital form and make a book.  Until now, I will add little pieces here and there. 

 

Parker's Fieldtrip Walnut Creek Historic Society

Parker had a field that was a walking tour through downtown Walnut Creek.  We didn't think it was going to be that fun, but it ended up being really cool.  The class, which is pretty active, did amazing for about 90% of the tour, which was a huge win.  It helped they played at the park before and after and had really engaging tour guides.  They heard about how they were the hands of the future world, the Miwok native americans and what Walnut Creek used to be like, horse and buggy streets, the historic buildings and even a trap door. I was glad I got to go with Parker.  He was sad because we couldn't drive others because they needed a new declaration page from me, even though nobody else needed one but it all worked out and Parker was in a group as soon as we got to the park. There was one mom who was on a mission to punish the kids.  It was sad to see her interactions and made me grateful that she wasn't their teacher.  Every teacher has their strengths and weaknesses and one of Mr. Mellingers strengths is he loves the kids and treats them with respect.  One mom almost punched this chaperone out when she handled her son wrongly.  It was quite the experience.  We all have our bad days. Hopefully hers goes better tomorrow. Overall, great day! 

 

Stake Conference

Last night and this morning we had the opportunity to attend stake conference.  The conference was amazing.  Some highlights were the Friday night session for adults.  There was a convert who was 80 and a sister who came back to the church as a young mom.  The gospel has had such a powerful light and influence in their life.  

Tyler accompanied the stake choir.  They had never practiced together and it took a lot of hard work and faith on his end to go and do something he was asked to do.  He said he never wants to do something like that again and it was very stressful for him leading up to it, but he did it!  And the conference was so focused on just going and doing what we are asked to do.  I am proud of him for working so hard and doing something out of his comfort zone.  I did tell him that in the future it would be nice to work on being a little more patient and kind in the process when he is stressed out. 

Elder Sabin shared a really touching story about his daughter.  His son had died about a year prior when it looked like his16 year old daughter was going to die if she didn't get a double lung transplant due to the same condition as her brother.   Two ward members gave her a lobe of their lung and she told her dad that "it didn't matter if she got new lungs or woke up in a better place." It was a great reminder to him that he needed to have an eternal perspective. Doctors didn't give her a good prognosis and she miraculous gained strength, woke up and went to work.  He said she understood the gift she was given and wasn't going to squander that gift.  He related that to the gift we have each day to work towards ushering in the Savior, preparing ourselves and preparing others. 

He talked about the prophets and when Elder Kimball was in and out of being lucent, he called President Hinckley who got dressed at 3AM and rushed to his house.  Elder Kimball said to call President Nelson and President Oaks in that order to fill seats in the 12.  That even though our prophet and others are old, in their 90's, the mantle is still very much with them and the Lord will strengthen them when and if needed.

Today, President March, Judd and Hagan got released and President Chapman got called to be our new stake president.  He will be great.  I told Danny this morning he would probably be called if it wasn't too difficult to release him from the mission presidency.  He and Marci will be great! I am grateful for the priesthood, our priesthood leadership and know, without a doubt that these men are called of God.  

It was a great conference.  The general authorities talked about the urgency of preparing for the Savior, both in our hearts and as a people.  He said he often gets asked if the world needs more wickedness before the Savior comes which he laughs about.  He said we don't need more wickedness, the world is plenty wicked but we need a people that are ready for him.  

He said that renewed urgency was and is seen in Elder Holland and each of us should be like the Prophet and say each day, "It is going to be a great day." 

He also said, "It is a lot harder to be 95% in than 100% in."  There couldn't be a more true statement about the church and in life.  That 5% of being out takes so much effort, thought and pull from what we know it right. Edified!