NEW JOB

When we moved out to Brentwood to be closer to Danny's work 5 years ago, I finished up my season with Aquabears and Valley Vista and decided to be a mom.  My heart wanted to be home with my kids at night, go to their sports and eat dinner at a normal time.  It was a really hard decision because I loved the families, coaches and team I was with.  It was the perfect part time job but I just wanted to be home and it turned out to be the best decision for my family.  I had no idea at the time that I would soon become a caretaker for both my parents.  How grateful I am that I was able to spend so much quality time with my parents the last couple of years of their lives.  I know that many people don't have that choice but my sister and I were blessed to have that time.

Heather and I were always so grateful that our husbands worked so hard so that we could be with our parents and help take care of them.  That is a gift that Danny gave to me!

Of course I couldn't stay totally out of swimming so I worked with one age group at a time in Oakley where Scott swam.  I loved it!  It was just 30 or 60 minutes, but it was doing something I loved!  It had built in childcare at the gym which made it so convenient.  Coaching fulfills me and I am so grateful for my time with Aquaknights.  They became like family and I grew to love the kids and parents.  It was different than teams in the east bay and took some adjustment at first but soon became a great home for us.

A couple of months after my dad passed away and life became a little more routine, I started to think about finding a team that would be a better fit for Scott.  When Scott swam in meets he wouldn't even try half the time.  I don't think it was on purpose, it was just that he didn't have a reason to race.  He loves swimming and loves friends and I just felt like he was getting at an age that maybe I should give him a team where he could really thrive.

So I reached out to the closest competitive team over the hills to see who was coaching since I knew the previous coach might not come back.  It was a great community and I felt would be a great fit for our family.  I sent out an email to the board to see who they hired someone and see if I could help in any capacity.

Long story short, I interviewed for an assistant job and ended up getting the head coaching job because it didn't work out with the head coach they were going to hire.

The entire time, it just felt right.  I had interviewed about a month or two earlier with a local team and got the job but it never felt right so I didn't take it.  People thought I should just take the local job and all the things I didn't feel right about would just work themselves out, but I never felt right about it so didn't take it.  I always felt to be patient and something would work out.  I am not a patient person, but I was so patient with our summer plans.  I didn't feel any pressure to coach, so it wasn't that big of a deal but when this all worked out, it affirmed to me the importance of listening to those small guiding feelings we have.

I love those teaching moments.  I feel like the more we heed the Spirit, the more willing we are to be patient in the future.

So I took the job and felt soo great about it!  From the first phone interview to my interview with the board and talking to coaches and parents about the team, I just got excited.  I knew it was where I was supposed to be either in a coaching capacity or just as a swim mom.

We just finished week 4 and I am having so much fun!  It is a great team, great group of kids, great parents, great board.  I really feel so blessed.

Coaching has given me great balance in my life.  I feel like I am a better mom during the day, managing my time more wisely (because I have to) and really making the most of my time with my kids.  I still have a LONG way to go, but I am learning and growing and becoming a more balanced person, better mom and hopefully eventually better wife (still working on that).

Scott had a rough first week having to stay at the pool with me for most of his evening, not knowing many kids and being cold in the water.  He worked hard, but there were a couple of days he was in tears of not having anyone he felt to hang out with.  By week 2 or 3, he was looking forward to going to hang out with his friends.  Everyone has been so kind to him.  I will never forget one day he was in tears when we arrived, I went to talk to two boys playing basketball to see if Scott could join them and they were soo nice.  One kid said he joined the team from another team two years ago and knew how Scott felt.  He went above and beyond to make Scott feel better.  Well, now Scott is disappointed if he can't go because of other commitments.  He is working so much harder than he has ever worked and really loves it.  He has made some great friends and has a lot of fun!  What a great thing to see because ultimately, that was my main motivation of finding a new team.

Coaching has been so fun for me.  I really do LOVE it!  I feel like it was a gift that I have been given that really gives me so much joy!  I love seeing a new 4 year old get across the pool or an 18 year old doing something that is preparing them for adulthood.  Rec is really fun to coach because everyone is sprinting.  So much easier in some ways than USS that you have your many different groups and training focuses.

The family is adjusting.  I really need to learn to be more disciplined at home.  I need to prepare my week ahead of time with meal prep, laundry, babysitters, etc.  I am not a planner, so this is good for me!  It will be a great life lesson for me.  Kira is having the hardest time.  She really misses me.  She loves gymnastics but that has been really hard for her to do without me.  She melted down a couple of times at school missing and wanting me, so I have tried to be very careful to spend quality time with her as soon as she gets home from school at 12 until I go to work at 3.  We have done little dates and I have made sure to put her to bed at night.  All those things and time have helped.  Pushing back her bedtime so she can see me at night has been a great thing.

I need to be careful not to neglect Blake during the morning when I am trying to get things done so I am staying up later at night to try to organize my day.  Hence, writing this at midnight.  Scott is with me so that has been good quality time.  We ride in the car and talk, sing, listen to music.  What a wonderful treat to have that quality time with him. I need to carve out that time with Tyler.  He doesn't seem to need it as much, but deep down I know he does.  He is my tough, seemingly unemotional kid, but in many ways that is just a wall.  I am trying to be better at really focusing on the good instead of the difficult in him (which can be hard at times because he tests me the most), but he has a good heart and is a good kid, especially when I focus on that.  The baby is doing fine.  He is a pretty go with the flow, easy little man.  I am really enjoying him.  I hope he stays that way!  Poor

Danny is probably being neglected the most because I am focusing so much on compensating for giving to my kids that he gets put on the back burner.  We are doing better, learning to balance me working.  It is hard because Kira has always loved and still does love her dad, but dad can't replace mom.  I know that is hard for Danny.  I am so grateful that he is giving 150% after work to make it possible for me to work.  Originally, we planned on a babysitter staying later so that he could go to the gym and just have some down time, but the kids just really need us right now so we hopefully eventually will get there.  He doesn't complain, gets up early to do piano and breakfast, helps clean the home, doesn't complain about what doesn't get done and I am just very grateful for him.  I can work on more patience and need to work on carving out just as much time for him as I do for my kids.  So this week that becomes my focus.

I feel like going back to work is this giant learning curve of balance and I am sure when the summer is over I will feel like I am just starting to figure it out.  But it is good things, good life lessons of love, sacrifice and balance that will continue to bless my life.