Parker

I still call Parker Blake but at least when I realize he is not actually Blake, I can remember his real name.  I CAN'T believe he is 2 months.  He is 12.5 pounds and doing well except for a clogged tear duct.  His doctor thinks he might have something that is underdeveloped in his lungs that with time babies outgrow.  I love him so much and so grateful for his presence in our life.  I think he is starting to actually smile.  Yesterday when I texted my friend his picture, she said it was just gas.  Yesterday on the couch and today at church he kept smiling and I really think he was smiling at me.  Whether it is gas or love, I love it either way.  Kira loves to have pictures taken of her.  She is so affectionate towards Parker.  Always wants to hold him and love him.  Blake on the other hand seems to be throwing endless tantrums since he arrived.  I have never had a child jealous of a baby but I really thin that Blake is jealous of him so I need to try to have special time with Blake.  We went to the demolition derby on Friday.  Parker was in the ergo and Blake LOVED holding my hand, sitting next to me and having me to himself since Danny was walking around with the other kids looking at tigers and such.  I realize he really needs that so going to see if giving him more attention will reduce his tantrums and anger. Parker is looking more like my other boys. None of the really look like each other but they all resemble each other.  He is doing a little better.  He has been my fussiest baby besides Tyler who had gallstones.  I used to think Colic was simply having a fussy baby, but now I realize that it is a real, very sad thing.  There have been some days that he cries and cries and cries and you can tell he is in pain.  The past week or so he seems to have turned a corner.  I cut out most dairy.  I drink soy milk most of the time.  I cut out chocolate but that didn't last very long.  I have no discipline.  I think the thing that helped the most is that I stopped pumping so my flow is slower and I am not drowning him and making him gulp in air.  His doctor claims that colic usually ends in the next couple of weeks or month so hoping that with time he will continue to be happier.  He is the first baby that I really do most of the work with. I think it is because I wanted a baby more than Danny so I feel like if I asked for him, I better be the one caring for him.  Also Danny has been so busy with work, that I want him to be able to relax when he is home.  But so grateful that when I am done, Danny will come to the rescue and do whatever I need help with which I am so grateful for.  I am so grateful I get to be a stay-at-home mom. Even after the long, hard days, multiple tantrums or exhaustion that comes with being with your kiddos all day, I wouldn't change it.  So grateful Danny works so hard so that I can stay home.